Last night my husband and I went to his 15 year class reunion and my mom came over to babysit. My sister's son (who's 12) was already here hanging with Adam.
As soon as she comes in she asks my husband to help her put flooring in her basement, then said if you do I buy you a case of beer and give you a lap dance ?????? what the hell. I said, Mom please don't act like a hooker to my husband! My mom, Oh I was just teasing heehee!
She has started hanging with some bar hoppers and has started acting like them ~ gross!
Then I came home and she was acting like she was so proud at yelling at Adam for rewinding the movie to watch the same part again. And said they got into a 15 minute yelling match and then said, and guess who won?? ME! I thought ~ RUDE! He knows he is allowed to do it and she knew it too. I do not understand why people think it funny to try to teach him this is how it is instead of just being a grandma and loving them.
Then I noticed a mark on his forhead from falling I was told.
They didn't get a long the whole time and my nephew told me my mom was mean to my son the whole time.
I am so mad and don't know what I just do..............................
Hi, Robyn, sorry for your troubles.
ReplyDeleteThis is what I would do. I would call your mom & TRY to have a polite conversation with her about what happened. I would tell her that you would like to speak first, without being interrupted, the tell her how you feel. Then, try to listen to her side.
Tell her that her actions, especially for a Grandmother, were unacceptable. Tell her that you will not allow her to behave in such a manner when visiting, & if it continues, she will NOT visit.
She is a grown up & should not be getting into screaming matches w/ a child. Rewinding movies is something that kids do, all the time.
My kids watched "UP" for 6 days straight! Nothing else in between & some days 3 or 4 times consecutively! Ugh! But that is so much better than other things they could be watching.
Let your mom know that taking a "just kidding" attitude is for when she is with her friends & not your husband. I would not let her alone w/ him after such talk. Nor would I let him do the floor for her unless she apologized, appropriately, to BOTH of you. That is bar talk, it can stay there! (however, keep that one in the back of your head for when you want a "honey do" job done, lol)
Have you talked to your son about what they were screaming about? It is also disrespectful of him to get into a screaming match w/any adult. Only out of respect for them, wrong or right. If he would get into a match w/ his grandmother, then who next? I understand he was angry, so I wouldn't be very harsh, but a gentle reminder of respect should be issued.
The same for your mom. If she feels that she can treat your son in an unkind manner, then she is not a suitable choice for a sitter! And I would let her know that in a not so gentle manner!!
Good luck! Melanie
Melanie ~
ReplyDeleteThanks for commenting on this post. I agree with everything you have said and I will talk with my mom tomorrow.
My nephew continued to tell me more thing my mom did while watching them. Texting interent boyfriends, more yelling and being mean. I do not understand it, but I am going to tell her tomorrow that she is no longer aloud to watch my son.
I did talk with my son and he said he got yelled at for everything and my nephew agreed with him.
I am hoping she takes me serious and doesn't just laugh it off and act like I am over reacting.
I guess I will find out tomorrow! And thanks for the good luck I think I am going to need it.
Robyn, I sure hope your talk went well with your mom. Seems to me that she may be going through a "change of Life". Not THE CHANGE, but some sort or another.
ReplyDeleteHas she always acted like a teenager?
Stand firm in not allowing her to visit. I am quite sure if you were home none of these carrying on(s) would have occured! You could have halted them.
And, of course, she may act the part of the insulted teen, but do not let that get you down. To think that your own mother could treat her grandchild in such a fashion d frightening.
I just kept thinking about how you said she was so proud of herself for "winning" an arguement w/ a child. She is certainly acting the part herself!! :(
Is your nephew also her grandchild?
Do you have siblings near by?
I would consult w/them to see if this behavior has happened in their presence as well. Maybe there are other factors to consider....Not taking her defense. Just keep thinking that perhaps she is trying to relive a "lost" part of her life or maybe she has gone start raving mad!
Do not worry if she thinks you are over reacting. This is your child. He can be scarred from abuse. I only remember happy things about my grandmother. I would hope that your son would be able to say the same one day!