I have been very depressed about my husband for a while now and I guess it is time to hold my chin up and figure out just what I am going to do. This afternoon I have decided to stop feeling sorry for myself and start thinking of my child. I am still sad, but I know I am a strong person who will be able to handle it. I actually feel better since I have realized Matt wants out of the marriage and I am done trying to hold on to something that isn't going to last and is making us both unhappy. And it is effecting our son, and he is the most important person in the world and we need to think of him first.
Now I need to figure out what the next step is going to be. I haven't a clue other then it will be one that is going to change our lives and hopefully for the better. I so love being married and being a family, but I also love being happy and seeing us all happy.
Through all of this I still cannot find it in me to hate or even really dislike Matt. I know he was been through a lot in his life and is depressed. I hope one day he will find the one thing that will make he happy. It doesn't make me proud to know that I am not that one thing, but I hope we will be able to stay friendly for our child. Adam is a wonderful little boy who loves everyone and he doesn't need both of his parents acting like children.